Thursday, April 18, 2013

Favorite Captured Moments.

I had a terrible headache today.  I am sure because of all the storms coming and going.  So, I ended up drinking A LOT of iced coffee to try to get it to go away, and here I am wide awake at almost 2 in the morning!  I decided while my house is all quiet to look through some pictures I have saved in picassa.  I am obsessed with pictures, with documenting.  I am sure my kids think its annoying, but someday they will be happy.  They will never have to wonder,  they will always have a picture!  Memories fade but pictures last forever.

Here are a few of my favorite pictures:


My girls Halloween 2012: The princess and the Zombie Bride
My handsome  boy, 2012.  He loves to look Handsome.
Getting ready to go cut down our Christmas tree 2012. One of the best memories.
October 2012, they fight like sisters but are best friends till the end.
October 2012.  They are not twins but by those faces you can tell what damage they can do!
Sept 2012.  Bryce loved this picture.  He kept saying "FIRE!"
Sept 2012.  Kids climbing the fence.  Girls insisted on wearing those dresses.
Sept 2012.  Love my buddy's eyes.
Sept 2012.  Love my girlies eyes.
Nov 2012.  Em and her trademark smile.
Nov 2012.  Nana and buddy walking through the national park in TN.
Nov 2012, hiking through the park.
Nov 2012, hiking through the park.
Nov 2012, hiking through the park.
Thanksgiving 2012.  The first picture I looked at of Haley and truly though she was 15 instead of 7.
Nov 2012.  My kids at my grandfathers funeral lunch.  Sad day but nice memories to see all the family together.  Plus they look so stinken cute!
Dec 2010. Bryce's first Christmas!  Em was obsessed with talking to him like baby!
Depot Park Fall of 2011, the three kids feeding the ducks.
Depot Park Fall of 2011
Depot Park Fall of 2011. Did not even ask her to do that, took the picture at the right time.
Depot Park Fall of 2011.  Love this pic for obvious reasons.


Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Does it really take a Village?



I don't read or really watch Fox News however I came across and interesting article called, We are raising a generation of deluded narcissists (Jan 8, 2013).  This was probably one of the few times where I thought Wow, they got it right.  To take a step back and look at this world that we have each helped to create I cannot help but agree.

Our kids are raised with this foolish ideology that they are the most important being in the world, that all that matters is their point of view, their feelings, and their social media pages.  Accumulating masses of "friends" and "followers", recording things that should never even occur let alone be recorded (how many girls have been sexually assaulted or assaulted in general to have it posted all over FB or youtube? I am at a loss: do kids think this funny? do they not think they are doing something wrong? Are they so disconnected with reality that they think doing such ridiculous things are okay?).  Social Media has become a life force all its own and I do not think that most parents or the public schools have caught on yet or even know how to deal with it. 

I am struggling because I do not want to appear judgmental but how do all of these kids get so off-based?  How do we keep producing all these people that are so self centered? I do not have teenagers, yet, and to be honest I am almost dreading it  For lack of a better way to say it:  my kids will have to deal with stuff that I have never had to walk through.  The internet was basically brand new when I was growing up, cell phones were not "in" until I was like 19 (puh-lease in "my day" all the cool kids walked around with pagers and quarters in their pockets to call people from the payphones.)  Despite all of that, I hope I can still teach my children respect.  Respect for all people and for themselves.  They are no better then the next person.  Facebook, youtube, or any other site out there on the internet doesn't decide or validate who they are or who they will become. 

My hope is to raise my kids with a broader scope of vision than a cell phone or an ipod or what video they can post on whatever site is cool at the time.  I hope I can raise my children to be the kids who grow into the adults that run into the fire to help others, not to be the people who can't even see the fire because they are too consumed with themselves.  I do not believe in home schooling, however there is a HUGE part of me that just wants to take my kids and keep them shielded and protected from so much non-sense, but I realize that that my role as a parent is much larger than that.  I have three children.  Three kids that will become teenagers and adults.  Its my job to help them become the best they can be so they can help create a better world, so they can help stop these terrible cycles so they can contribute great things (no matter how big or small) to this world.  I do not know what my kids will be when they are all grown up, but I do know that I will fight for them and fight against this attitude that is prevalent in our society. 

I have been thinking about this since a young boy killed himself in a local middle school not that long ago.  I have since found so many heartbreaking stories of young kids being tossed to the side like garbage by their peers. Since when do we raise our children to not care about fellow human beings?  Since when do we teach our kids that there is nothing more important than themselves?  Lets be real here.  Who do we really blame? 

We live in the world where it truly feels like its each man for himself.  I will fight my way through, step on whoever I have to in order to survive.  What a caveman mentality.  I truly believe in the saying that it takes a village to raise a child.   It takes my friends, my family and my neighbors looking out for each other to raise a wonderful next generation.  What happened to community? To brotherhood? To loving your neighbor?

Teaching our kids to be loving, to be respectful, to look out for others is more than a one time conversation.  Its a lifestyle.  Its more than a few minute conversation in class at school. There has to be a way to fight this direction we all seem to be heading in.  It has to start somewhere.

I encourage everyone to take a few moments and read about just a few kids and their struggles (copy and paste the URL):

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/03/21/michigan-student-13-commits-suicide/2006643/


http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/04/14/17747411-california-case-another-three-part-tragedy-of-rape-cyber-bullying-and-suicide?lite

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2218532/Amanda-Todd-Anonymous-names-man-drove-teen-kill-spreading-nude-pictures.html

http://www.denverpost.com/opinion/ci_22843875/rape-ohio-shows-perils-and-power-social-media

The two girls pictured at the top of this post are Amanda Todd and Audrie Pott.  The parents of these beautiful girls want their children's stories to be the voice of change.  I believe now is the time for education, educating our children on so many levels, helping them realize  that even if a crowd of people is walking in one direction it is okay to turn and walk the other way.  It is okay to help the person who has been kicked down.  It is okay to not be a carbon copy of your peers.  It is okay to make mistakes.  In the case of both of these girls, they made mistakes that cost them their young lives.  One girl drank alcohol at an unsupervised party leaving her vulnerable to the worst of the worst, the other girl sent inappropriate pictures of herself to an online predator.  It is okay to teach our children to stand up to people, to stand up for injustice, to stand up for the things that are going wrong in this world.

I hope that I can help contribute to change.  My every breath will be to help create change, to educating my children, to helping this cycle of a self destructive society to end. 

Ending my post with this video from YouTube.  Please take a few moments and watch.  I really believe that change starts with me and my family.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=VF6cmddWOgU









Sunday, April 14, 2013

Sleeping Beauty and the Beautiful People

Had the opportunity to go to a community theater production of  Sleeping Beauty, we took my mom (my kids wonderful Nana for her birthday), a best friend of the girls and my wonderful sister in law. We had a wonderful time going to out to eat and the play was very well done. 

Here is what my girls had to say about the night in their own words:

Emily :

I haded fun, and I likeded the part when the princess was sleeping.  I didn't like the grouchy fairy, she was very mean and really super mean, and she was singing a song about being mean.  I likeded the part when she came out and sat on someone's lap singing about how she liked to be a troll.
 (Trollarina came out in the crowd and started messing with the audience)

Haley:

I had fun eating ice cream with my Nana, Auntie Charray, Jasmine and Emily before the play.  In the play I liked the troll (the bad fairy: Trollarina) because she was funny.  She had spiky black hair and it was all messy and her clothes were all disgusting.  She sang about spinning and how it is lovely to be a troll.  I liked Sleeping Beauty, she was very pretty and she sang very good.  I liked the dress she wore, it was blue with sparkles. I liked the fawn prince (Trollarina turned a prince into a fawn), I liked him because he was very funny because he went around the stage skipping.



Here are a few pics of the Beautiful People:
Haley and Jaz

Jaz and Em

 Emmers and Nana waiting for food

Nana with her grand babies

Best friends waiting for the show to start

Charray, Mom and Emmers

Waiting for the play to start!

Haley reading about the cast members


This was intermission: The whole cast went to sleep and stayed liked this until the show started again.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

The Face of Greatness

There are moments in life when something just stops you in your tracks, where you see something, hear something, read something that just makes you stand still and catch your breath and refocuses your mind.  Well, with that said, I came across another blog sorta kinda by accident (specifically Chet DeRouen - the link to his blog will be posted below- is friends with my childhood youth pastors, John and Star Forbis who I still keep in contact with on FB) and in reading his blog I had this moment where my mind just stood still and I knew I had to talk to this guy.   I would encourage anyone who would like to view the world from a different perspective to take a moment to read his blog.
To see someones life struggle written down is heart wrenching as he is a good person just trying to live an honest life.  I would say, there are few people who would be willing to talk so freely about their life struggles.  We tend to say the quick, "Hey How are you"  not really wanting to know the truth, not really wanting to take the time to listen to another persons heartbreak.   I had tons of questions and thoughts running through my mind and it came down to the fact that I could not help but to relate to this person I had never met. In fact we all could probably relate; as we all have been through loneliness, guilt, shame, feelings of nonacceptance, and anger.  We are all just people who want to be loved and want to feel as though we belong. 
In the process of our conversation back and forth on his blog he asked me to write something for him.  It did not take me more than five minutes to realize what I had to say and what was in my heart.  In my quest to be a better human being this is what I wrote:
The Face of Greatness
Great explorers of man-kind have always looked to the sky, to the wind, to the horizon and held a belief that there was so much more than they could see.  The great risk takers, looked at the world as they knew it and said there has to be more.  There has to be more than that this tiny street I live on, there has to be more than what I can see.  It really was not that long ago that people thought the world was flat, or that women were witches and burned at the stake, or that women held no place in society other than to birth children, or that people of "color"did not deserve the most simplest of what life had to offer.

 The thought of something new, something new being acceptable is hard to comprehend.  Hence, why life has constantly been a battle, a battle between what you feel and what I feel, between what this country wants and what that country wants.  What this group of people believes is acceptable and what the other groups believes is not.  Putting it simply: I am right, you are wrong.

We live in age and in an era where voices, opinions, media are pushed in our faces as we are driving down the road, blaring through our radios, and popping up on our phones.  Its easy to adopt view points to take them on as our own when you surround yourself with a constant barrage of "people" telling you: THIS IS WHO YOU ARE, THIS IS WHO YOU MUST BE.  There comes a point in time, where we must all choose, choose to put down the outside voices and close our eyes and listen.  Listen to the quiet and listen to the peacefulness, listen to that quiet little voice reminding you of why you are here.

We are here to still notice the horizon, to still look out at the stars and wonder, to walk outside and feel the wind blowing through the air and think, What am I?  Who am I?  We are all human beings who at the core want love and acceptance.  Its not my place, its not my job to tell you who you need to be or what road you should choose.  My path is my own,  your path is yours.  The difference being what will I choose to do?  Will I be the person who lives un-fullfilled?  Will I be the person that holds onto to selfishness, anger, and hatred? Or will I be the person to forgive? Will I be the person who will go the way of the great explorers and risk takers?  It is time for all of us, as the human race, as fellow citizens, as neighbors to stand up and look to the sky and regain that courageous spirit, the spirit of love and kindness.

There is not one of my neighbors who does not deserve love, mercy, compassion.  It is MY job as a person to look to my left and to look to my right and say who am I?  I am no better then the next.  I believe that humility sparks change, that love sparks change, that compassion sparks change.  Look at any great leader and you will find those qualities, you will see those qualities before you see anything else.  The face of greatness takes a moment, takes a breath and does not rise up in hate but in love and respect.

The bottom line is, it comes down to your choice on your behavior.  You have been made you for a reason, you were born with your first and last name for something specific, you have been born with the endless possibilities of greatness. You have the capability to see, to hear, to feel.  You have the capability of change, to spark change, to create change.  You were not born to hate, to judge, to dictate to another what they should be.  You control you,  you set your course, you decide if you are going to pack it in or if you will put on that face of greatness that you were meant to.

The face of greatness, is to have the expectation of ourselves to rise to the occasion.  You can be the person, you can be the one, you can be the risk taker, the great explorer of the unknown and the uncharted territories.  You can be the one to start progress, to kick start a change.  The face of greatness. I believe you have what it takes.  I am talking to you- the mother, the father, the preacher, the teacher, the liberal, the conservative.  This is my message and what I believe is a requirement for all of us: Take a risk to be the face of greatness and love your neighbor as your self. 
(To view Chet DeRouens blog you can click this link http://whyamigayblog.wordpress.com/about/ )

Friday, March 29, 2013

Marriage, What?

Okay, relationships, long term relationships and  marriage.  My other half and I have been together for 11 years this December and married 6 this May (gasp- my daughter is 7 and a half, yes, we had her out of "wedlock").  Marriage is funny, I think because we come into relationships with expectations.  We think, oh I should do this and they should do that.  I guess if I had to describe how I used to feel it would be like this: Life would carry this special magic wand that says, "Don't worry, it will be a fairytale."  We think that just because we fell in love with someone that it will have this easy breezy way about it.  (Ever seen Enchanted?)  I am by no means saying love, life, or anything of the such cannot be a fairytale but a fairytale life takes work.

Marriage is work, long term relationships require work. A full time job plus more.  Learning how to talk, how to communicate, how to listen.  We both come with this idea of; you know what, I am right, so there.  We think that love is just something that happened not something that we have to work at to keep alive.  The key to being in a happy relationship I think is this clue right here: work.  Life usually just doesn't walk around handing out winning lotto tickets.  Lord have mercy, it doesn't even let most of us buy a winning lotto ticket!

Everyone walks through good times and bad times with their significant other.  I think sometimes we forget that just because we walk through something difficult does not mean that we need to be ashamed or pretend like we did not walk through it.  There is this weird pressure, not sure if I would call it peer pressure but there is this marriage pressure out there. Who has it perfect?  Who had the best wedding?  Who had the most expensive, most glamorous wedding?  Who looks adoooorrabbblllleeee together? Who has the best house? The best cars? It seems so appearance based and superficial.  Do you look the part?  Can you act the part? The problem with marriage is that it is not a page out the Vanity Fare, or the Cosmo, or the bride(zilla) mag you are currently reading.  Marriage is this force, this life all is its own. To say I do for the rest of my life, the rest of your life is something is that is down right amazing.  When we are young -and dumb- I don't think we have the capability to grasp this concept. 

I am now at the age where I am kinda shocked that I am here.  Seriously. I am 30?  No, that's not right.  My daughter will be 8 this year - hold up.  How in the heck did that even happen??  But you know what I am 30 and so much wiser (obviously with some room still to grow). I see the life that my other half and I have lived together and realize the places we have been and where our life can go.  Has it been an easy ride? Has it always been fun? Um, no.  But do I think that we can make it through? Absolutely and I think our life will be wonderful because we have each other.  What better thing then to be able to look at each other and say "Through it all, we stuck together."  The good, bad, ugly, beautiful, worse, wonderful.  When it is astounding, when we are struggling we still choose to stick together because together we are so much more then we are apart. 

Life isn't always rainbows and walks on the beach (unless maybe you are born with that shiny silver spoon in your mouth but then that's still up for debate another day and another time). We have to work and work hard for the things we want in life.  We have to fight to make relationships a priority, to make them fun, to make them safe, to make them spontaneous. 

I am closing this memory page with a few pictures of my wedding day, which I do have to say was one of the most fun experiences of my life.  We did our wedding our way, in our own time.  When I sit back and think about it, it makes me smile and wish we could do it all over again.  I don't think I would change a thing, our wedding wasn't perfect.  We were married by what my husband calls the "cattle caller" and there was this amazingly grouchy woman who yelled "PLEASE RISE FOR THE BRIDE" in the most horrible voice you could ever imagine.  My blue flowers, the chapel promised me, were spray painted blue and reeked.  They were also doing some sort of remodel on the building the day we got married.  When Brian and I cut our wedding cake, we both realized that we never discussed what we would do and assumed the other was smashing cake in our face.  So guess what?  You can see the picture below for yourself!

Our wedding wasn't perfect but you know what, in the same aspect it was.  It was exactly what it needed to be, a reminder that who really cares? Am I really going to get hung up on something so silly?  What matters was and still is that we were there together and we were in it for the long haul. For better or worse I look forward to many years to come.


In the limo driving to the court house for our marriage license. We only had Red Bull no champagne. But we still toasted!

I think this is where I got the hands mixed up.
Look out our faces... such a wonderful moment!
Probably the only thing I have kept secret from my husband, that Elvis was going to sing at our wedding!
This is a cute kiss, but I really put the picture up in reference to my blue flowers!
My baby girl, she was a serious kisser.
Yeah, we look so innocent.

This is what happen when you clearly do not discuss what you are going to do when you cut the cake!
Vegas Baby!  We will forever feel a profound love and connection to Las Vegas!



Thursday, March 28, 2013

Pizza Making, walks and playground days

I have gotten to spend so much wonderful time with my "two little ones". They, however, are not so little anymore. I think I am going to have a hard time trying to stop calling them that. Its been so nice to see the progression in their relationship, the constant fighting over ridiculous stuff to now they barely ever fight.  They actually play together, hold hands even without the urge of knocking the other one out.  They are not twins, but sometimes I feel like they might as well be with just having a little over a year difference between them.

The end of March is coming and the last few days have been decent (when I say decent I mean high 30s if we are lucky, mid 40s).  We have gone on a few walks and finally played on the playground.  This morning after we dropped H off at school, Bryce was begging me to go to the playground.  When I said no to the playground, he wanted to get pizza, when I said no to the pizza he begged for his Papa Nick.  All my kiddos have a profound love for my parents, they have this connection with them that goes beyond anything I can describe.

Here are a few pictures to remember some moments we have had and to give us something positive to look forward to tomorrow... bright, sunshiny days ahead.












Saturday, March 23, 2013

Bowling with the Bunny

I love when we can find fun things to do with our kiddos at a very appropriate price.  Our local bowling alley had Bowling with the Bunny. The kids got to do glow in the dark bowling, got pictures with the (semi-creepy) bunny, pizza and pop.  Bryce is obsessed with bowling and he is pretty good at it to, his first game he was pretty close to 100 and the majority of his balls did not even need assistance from the bumpers.  Haley's first game was 115 and Emilys?  Well she is all over the place and was more concerned with dancing around and quote "shaking her butt" then about actually bowling, the world is her stage- yes, even at the bowling alley.

Emily's favorite part of the day "I loved the big bowling pin.  I do not understand how he can see.  That was craaaazzy."  (There was a giant bowling pin walking around with the bunny, pic will be posted below)

Haley's favorite part of the day; I am sure it was leaving to go spend the night with her Nana Cindy and Papa Dennis.

It was very nice to to have the kids grandparents there!  The kids always love to see them.  We are a very lucky family to have grandparents that care so much about our little munchkins.